Sweet Treats and Crushes

I just realized that this is going to be my first post with words only! Well anyways, here goes…

I can’t say that I’ve been doing much these past few days, other than setting up Project Pony (which you can get to using the sidebar). However, I have this one guy who really
gets on my nerves, but you always end up knowing how the story goes, with the girl blushing, the boy kneeling, and all the mushy stuff in between. The thing is, he gets on my nerves in a good way. Dillon is super popular, and and amazing athlete. He’s nice to people, plus he’s funny. He is drop dead gorgeous, which obviously makes him every girl’s central crush. I shouldn’t be talking, though, since I have the pretty much exact same feelings as those other girls. *sigh*

My best friend, Jane, was in an elementary school group that included Dillon. It was Jane, a few girls, Dillon, and a few boys, back in those good old days when no one cared if boys and girls played together and Dillon wasn’t really popular. I think there is just this lasting friendship between Dillon an Jane that made my best friend introduce me to him. For me, it was pretty much love at first sight (unfortunately, you can never be sure about Dillon’s opinion). You know the rest, and I just realized that I’m pretty much rambling around about things that probably interest you zero percent, or at least very little. That’s why I’ll now get to the bottom line of this: I wish Dillon would notice me as more than just a friend.

On the happier note, I had an amazing weekend. Buggy (my links aren’t working, but I mentioned her on Project Pony) and I (Buggy is my pony- and yes, I am small enough for ponies, sadly)… where was I? Oh yeah. Buggy and I hit the away-show we went to this weekend with awesome results- first, first, second, and a final grand champion ribbon! (whoo!)

I wish that my whole life was as successful as that show was. Sadly, it isn’t.


Sophie the-not-so-great.

The Memory Game

It is such a bad title for the many things I really want to share right now. They’re things that I’ve watched happening, and now, I feel like kicking myself for not doing anything about them earlier. Well, rather- I’ve already mentally kicked myself. Now I want to do it physically, but I have to figure out how first. Though I have to tell this to myself: good luck with that. And I suppose: here is what I want to tell you.

It kind of started months ago: I guess I should introduce the “characters” first. Mary Jane? The girl being bullied- the one called a midget, a shrimp, and a million other things by people who’ve never even talked to her. Bethany, Courtney, Rose, and Lanie are the posse, the posse that I used to have a best friend in (Lanie was once my best friend). They’re feared, and you don’t exactly ever want to mess with them. That is, unless you’re like me, try it once, and then realize your immediate problem. It’s rather sad, since they’re a pretty good-looking bunch of girls, that lots of guys would want had they not been so vicious.

The first time I saw Mary Jane being bullied was six months ago (I think). Courtney had found her, and since Rose was absent, it was Lanie and Bethany who advanced on her. They said a lot of words that I don’t want to repeat- not because they were curse words, but simply because they disgust me so much. I knew what they were up to- saying things like, “Oooh, Mary Jane, love your shoes!’ and “Hey, Mary Jane. Come hang with us.”
Behind her back, though, they would be criticizing her, insulting her, and whispering their plans for her. I still feel horrible that I didn’t go up and say anything- but I guess it was just the fear of those girls that made me stop.


As if that wasn’t enough, the second time they struck was in the cafeteria about a month later. Mary Jane had become “friends” with Bethany, Courtney, Lanie, and Rose- she had genuinely thought that she had become “part of the cast”. It sickened me, but I just stayed watching. I think lots of people noticed it by then, but no one did much against it. It was always fear, fear, fear.
I don’t really know how it came to it, but suddenly Mary Jane had her face in her hands, she was crying, and she was running from the lunch table as if there was a rocket on her heels. I later heard, from someone that had watched the whole ordeal within earshot, that Lanie had “accidentally” let it slip that the whole clique had never thought positively of Mary Jane. I sort of understood Mary Jane better and better- a girl who had made some friends, girls whom she had dared to trust-girls who had ended up showing their despise for her. The next day, Mary Jane wasn’t in school.

I think it was kind of done after that- but then again, it wasn’t. Mary Jane kept going back to them. I wanted to tell her to just ignore them, and realize that they were all in all bad girls, but she wouldn’t hear of it. “Sometimes they’re nice, but sometimes they’re mean. There’s something that happens to basically “unleash” their meanness. I want to find out what it is.”
“Jane”, as she was nicknamed by some, was a girl who was so intelligent- she wasn’t like the rest of the grade, at all. She gave one person more than two chances, and even the worst people did she try to understand. I decided to stick around her more- not only did she turn out to be really kind, but also a kind of “dream” friend that lots of people wish they had.

It really explains a lot that Jane and I became the best of friends after that. Almost, I would actually thank the mean girls. They brought me more than they thought- they gave me Jane. Lanie and her troupe kept trying to “deflate” Jane. They tried new insults on her, criticizing her dream of coming to Yale University, telling her that in 20 years, they would be nice enough to take her off the streets and let her live in their mansions. But then, I always told Jane, “You shouldn’t believe them. You’re growing prettier and prettier and prettier by the minute. You are one of the smartest people in the school. You work harder than anyone. You can do anything with your life.” Jane thankfully took that as true (it was, but she was modest).

Later, Jane stopped going near Lanie, Bethany, Courtney, and Rose. It didn’t matter. We had each other.